Second note: (about 2020)

I'm not going to try to capture every post that I put up, in 2020, to Facebook, on this transferal run. I might occasionally add a post, if it seems particularly interesting (or poetic)...

I am having a vision coalesce (possibly as a revision at WordPress - Ha! ):
The decade, 2010-2019, as seen through a Facebook text lens (to avoid having to learn how to move memes around in the various media)...

I question, though, if I can be consistent enough, to capture *EVERY* post that I made, and keep them preserved, or if I might take some editorial license.

blank space: 1/27/20 to 1/30/20.

I know life got pretty busy this week, with a resurgence in game activities and with the start of college classes for tutoring... I"m pretty sure that this time frame was about when I pissed off Dana, too.

So, we did not keep up with checking the Facebook memories, and there might be some missing posts, left on Facebook. Then again, my prior runs at trying to transfer over to here might have caught some posts from earlier years.

Do I need “a cause to believe in”?
...doubtful, as I think I have a handful...
No... I need “a cause that believes in me”.
Perhaps it’s a weakness, but I need to be reminded, regularly, that someone’s, somewhere feels that I add value to their lives. Right now, those reminders are few and far in between the long stretches of silence, exclusion, and general lack of input.
How much of that falls back on my shoulders? Chided for not reaching out to others first, pursuing solitary interests, angry manic outbursts,...

vague feelings of exclusion
a desire to make broad, sweeping generalizations
when contradictory evidence has been presented
the vagueness of vague book
the frustration and despair
as i see old relationships withering away,
as i listen to the crypt-like silence
of a phone that only offers games from company,
the horrible self-image
that i have nothing to offer,
which other people would desire...
feeling like a village elder
who was abandoned when he could no longer hunt...
or a gen x with woefully poor tech skills,
or an unskilled laborer in a world
filled with master carpenters...
Fuck.
Death's Draw is heavy upon my breath, tonight.
perhaps that's why i attempt to write...
perhaps i just wanted company, today -
some attention from the crowd,
some recognition
i don't know what i want
i want my teeth to go back to normal.
i want my muscles to stop their spasm.
i want to forge bridges to cross the chasm
that keeps you and i apart,
even though we have a common heart.
it was a beautiful day,
yet i was in real pain
and i was in psychic pain...
makes ye yearn for a cleansing rain.

Today I learned that January 6th is celebrated as "Bean Day" in various locales. This brought a smile to me...