How Lord of The Rings Should Have Ended

Will this be my Movie Monday this week? Seems like there's a string of these "How...should have ended" videos on youtube...

O.. K..
..aaaand I'm awake.
mini day plan? meeting.. tax filing.. job search preparation, i.e. dust off the resume.. eat somethin'.
let's throw in a dash of meditation, and just go with the flow from there?

"Do you have any hobbies?"

"Do you have any hobbies?", Dominique asked me, tonight..



"Wouldn't mind getting back into acting," I replied.



Digging a little deeper, I voiced some interest in drawing, and maybe a sport like volleyball.. soccer.. hiking.. biking.. I also mentioned that I've thought about dance classes, but I'm a little put off by 'limited funds'. I was also sharing some pictures I have of art that I did in high school, but... that was, what, 20 years ago? I think this all got sparked by talking about our days, today, as I had mentioned too much time spent playing Pocket Frogs on my phone.



So, I have a collection of interests I've gathered over the years, and it seems that there's a thick layer of dust settling upon them. Part of me wants to blame lack of transportation, as I'm relying on the buses - even though I have a perfectly functional bicycle. Part of me wants to blame lack of finances, as I've been living from paycheck to paycheck for YEARS, now. ...and then there's the observation that the addict, or maybe bipolar, mind rears up, focusing all of my energy on one thing, leaving no time for the others.



I admire Len, as he seems to have a career where he can practice his art. I think that, ideally, we should all have careers where we get to explore our hobbies and interests, where we actually enjoy the labor we get paid to do. Out of the long laundry list of careers I've had, I would have to say I most enjoyed being a newspaper reporter/photographer for the local newspaper in my home town and tutoring college mathematics. There's an element of social interaction in both, but there's also some creative work in writing articles and some intellectual challenge in trying to find a mathematical explanation that's easily grasped by the struggling student. Also, with teaching, there's definitely a creative element in finding a good presentation of the material, although I'm a little wary of my ability to do so, based on past 'guffaws'. Thinking towards the next few months, I'm considering a career change, but I'd like to be a little more selective in my search, looking for careers that could give some vent to my creativity, whether that be teaching, or writing, or drawing, or . . .



So, "What are my hobbies?"



Can I gain some insight, based on past experiences, like from my high school activities, or collegiate pursuits? Anyone who knew me back then knows that I did lots of stuff. During high school, I was active in drama, in math and science contests, in choir... and that was when I wrote for the paper - a job I got because I did an awesome job reporting for the Math Club while I was their secretary. Also, my family knows that I read quite a bit, and had a fondness for computer games. Moving on to college, I dabbled a little more in acting, attended quite a lot of independent films and Performing Arts Center events, and spent a bit of time volunteering in the community. John could attest, too, to the continuing infatuation with all sorts of games.



I'm not too sure if that gives a complete picture of my past pursuits, or, especially, how much time was often devoted to them. As I hinted earlier, it's real easy for an activity to dominate my schedule if I enjoy doing it, with hours of each day spent in that arena.



Part of me feels like I'm drifting into my okcupid profile in what follows, but I'll go ahead and sketch what I find interesting (in no particular order, just what's coming to mind, first). I'm thinking aloud, too, wondering about a good career fit for these interests:



- I love attending movies and plays, and, to a lesser degree, live music. Perhaps I could be a critic?

- I've been known to act, and even sing, and people like to tell me "You sound like a radio announcer."

- I enjoy reading, but dislike the time investment that could require. Is that an editor?

- Athletically? I like to hike, or bike, or run long-distance... but not too sure if there's a good payoff besides better physical health.

- I'm kind of interested in learning how to dance better - Marissa (I think) once suggested I look into Body Choir after seeing me dance. Eh. Maybe. ..or maybe Flamenco, 'cause that seems like a style I drift towards. ..or maybe Ballroom, but I think that's motivated by a pining heart?

- I'm an avid fan of all sorts of games.. I think they appeal to my mathematical/logical mind, while still having some social context, too. Perhaps some sort of modeling/simulation career could tie in to that? ..or maybe a career in game design or game testing?

- I enjoy writing, and several people in the past have complimented me on my writing ability. What's kind of crazy is that almost all of my writing to date has usually been a first draft with minimal editing. Well, I should say, "editing while writing".. This is one reason I've been trying to revive my blog, and one reason why I feel most comfortable talking to people via email. Although, I'm decent at carrying on a conversation, one-on-one - just gets a lot harder in groups.

- I'm pretty good at drawing, too, although I need to work at my skills of drawing from live subjects (instead of pictures, or graphic design)



Not much else is jumping to mind as relates to particular pursuits. Currently, I think I'm spending a lot of time on the computer, divided between games, social networking, and writing. If I'm not at home, I'm probably at work, or at a meeting, or in transit. I'd like to get to the point where I have a better career, better suited to my interests, and with much more disposable income... but I know that's going to take some legwork on my part. Because I have to tend to that legwork, I'm much less likely to have some time to devote to the hobbies. I don't know - it just seems like this vicious cycle right now, but I believe there's a much better life available if I just "DO the Work".

Today I stand with the teachers, support staff, administrators and school boards of Texas who are fighting for the education of children in Texas. To the Texas Legislature I say: MAKE EDUCATION A PRIORITY. I hope you will change this to your status for the rest of the day.

Tune Tuesday: "Music of the Night" from "Phantom of the Opera"

I have a soft spot for film scores and musicals... something about the associated spectacle. I used to have a shirt that my mom got for me, when she saw the London showing of Phantom, and it had what is still one of my favorite lines from this song: "Open up your mind, Let your fantasies unwind..."

I don't remember the exact details, but somehow that shirt got traded to a Rocky cast member during one of the after-shows for that 'spectacle'. *Sigh* The foolishness of my youth.

Offering this up as a second favorite for Tune Tuesday - keeping with the film score focus theme... hope it's not embedding-disabled.

Tune Tuesday: Vangelis - conquest of paradise

Tune Tuesday! I first heard this song a couple of months ago, and its grown on me a bit.. just seems to have an epic spirit to it with the choral lines? Definitely makes me want to go out and see the film, now...

Movie Monday: A Clockwork Orange/ "the becoming of". (Stanley Kubrick)

hmm. interesting, in a sort of lo-res fashion... I'd rather post scenes from the original movie, especially the ones with Beethoven's 9th playing in the background, but, 'alas! video embedding disabled' - I'll go ahead and keep this post up, even if it is embedding-disabled...

Oh, yeah! So, my offering for Movie Monday this week is for "A Clockwork Orange", and this is 'someone else's synopsis'.

Couldn't get to sleep this morning... think it's cause I'm beset by allergies to something in the air, usually triggered by temperature change.
"Every Fall and Spring, my nose becomes this drippy thing.."

woke up this morning, thinking that a government teacher had put an essay question on his test, asking me to write a song about the law-making process, modeled off of Elvis' "You Ain't Nothing But a Hound Dog"...
The places my dreams can take me - I really should attempt to dream journal more, just to see if I can uncover and share some of them more interesting gems I have...

Tune Tuesday: Pink Floyd - "Bike" animated video

..heh! "..fast-paced borrowing action.."

..anyway, this was yet another fun song in my teens, and it's entirely possible I've posted it before, but - 'eh.' "You're the kind of girl..." could fit in with the VD theme, tonight, no?

Tune Tuesday: Axel the Sot ~ "The Moose Song" ~ (Moose Lust, Is It Wrong?)

...just one of several variations I've heard of this song, first heard through my involvement with the Texas Union's Madrigal Dinner. One verse, I particularly like:

"The people of old, they had their icons -
The Greeks, The Romans, The Aaa-ma-zons.
..But, get away - God, Buddha, Allah, and Zeus -
I'll get down on my knees for a moose!"

..posting this early, to continue the VD trend..

Movie Monday: "Rocky Horror Picture Show", trailer 2

...ah, yes, and then I got corrupted by a summer of Rocky, in '91. Watching just this trailer, I recalled comment after comment after comment...

Another post for VD..

Movie Monday: "The Princess Bride", Fan Trailer

Another favorite from my teens, posted here as my hand-waving towards that whole VD experience we're in.. :P

Movie Monday: "Harold and Maude" - dating service application scene

"'Do you have ups and downs without obvious reasons?' ..oh, yes, that's you, Harold!"

...if I ever choose to try another foray into online dating, I'd be approaching it much like Harold in this scene...

(Movie Monday: "Harold and Maude" - a favorite film of my teen years :) )

I'm at a loss for... uh...

Ah, the quandary...
How shall I spend this evening? 't would be nice if I had some spare funds - I'd probably catch Tron finally, or maybe go check out some other film (mm. guess there's youtube... :S )
...thinking I'll start off with an hour of 3 minute monologues, and just go with the flow from there...

"You're one with Odin, my son.."
'What? I'm going to poke my eye out, or something?'

Insanity Lessons: Be Aware of Your Sensory Input

One of the things I've come to learn is that my environment Can affect my mood. 

For example, playing classical music or jazz or just something familiar can be much more comforting and calming then, say, playing Death Metal or - shudder - Talk Radio.  Of course, those are my personal preferences, and yours are likely to differ.  I think I might be the rare person who can appreciate both Phillip Glass and The Pogues.  You may also think of this as, "There's music to dance to, music to study by, and music to ease you into sleep."

This idea is not just limited to background music, though.  The temperature of the room, the lighting, the arrangement of the furniture, the presence or lack of clutter...  anything our senses key in on - they will, and that feeds back into our brain's processing and thinking.  One of the effective Buddhist meditation practices, in my humble opinion, is to sit, looking at a  blank wall - as that really keeps you from being distracted by visual input, like the other people in your Sangha.  Also, it's a lot easier to meditate when the background noises are minimal. 

So, I find I like to arrange my environment, when I can, mostly to reduce stress, but also to nudge my thoughts a little in the direction I want to go. 

I call this an "Insanity Lesson" because it's one of those ideas I picked up in the midst of a major mania.  Locked up in the PICU of Shoal Creek in '96, I noticed the difference in the behavior of our angry patient when we changed the radio station in the day room.

The Nightmare Before Christmas-Town Meeting Song (Movie Monday / Tune Tuesday)

My attempt to revive a tradition from my Yahoo 360 days - this fits a contribution for Movie Monday, and Tune Tuesday, eh? ;)

...one of the joys of my new smartphone is playing Pandora on the filmscores station, seeded with Danny Elfman...

"Pecking..." (Stream of consciousness, 2/5/11 - reformatted to poem 2/5/17..?)

Tap. Tap. Tap...

(silence)

"mrr mrr mrr... Hah!"

Rattatat tat! Tat!...

...sounding like a machine gun,
his fingers flew over the keyboard,
as he gave words
to his divine inspiration,
riding it like a Florida surfer...

Sentence after sentence flowed on to the screen...

...and then, 20 minutes later,
the thoughts slowed to a trickle,
to a "Tap. Tap. Tap...."

...and stopped, again.

Some would say,
"A wise man would pause here,
and review what's been written,
tweaking it ever so slightly
to add fluidity
to those awkward phrasings -
all a 'Head Fake' to try to reconnect with the Muse."

However, he was determined to get a chapter written tonight,
and would plow forward,
adding gristle to the editing mill planned for the morrow,
just hoping beyond hope
he could meet his editor's impending deadline.

He didn't care that what he wrote was disjointed -
not well connected at all,
and laying the seed for tons of weeds around that mill.

So, he pecked at the keyboard,
like a pigeon looking for
kernals of truth in a barren field.

Were the similes and metaphors evocative enough?

Only time will tell...

What can I write about? 

To me, it seems I should stick to my own experiences and areas of expertise, for the most part.  This is a little difficult, because an original thought is hard to come by, these days.  Also, I am hardly an expert in most areas of life, mostly because I choose to forgo TV and newspapers and web surfing, and all those other media outlets, preferring to rely on the collective experience of  my friends.

There's a great book I read, once, for a class at UT-Austin.  I think it's titled Information Anxiety by Richard Saul Wurman?  It speaks volumes to the pitfalls of being a news junkie...

Now, I could also post links to videos and music that I enjoy, or internet references back to "authoritative" opinions, but, if I do so, I must follow the Reporters' Creed and remember attribution.

I imagine that I will be prone to indulge in some creative writing, too, just because I like to play with words.  If I get really creative, I might do some graphic art, too, either with pen and paper or with mouse and media program - we'll just have to see if that materializes somehow in my schedule.

So, I would claim to be an expert in mathematics, and fairly competent in the sciences - these are the fields I'm most likely to break my media ban for.  I like to think a bit about psychology and social dynamics and such, but, there, I am not well-read... doesn't mean I won't write about them, just that you should take what I say with a grain of salt.

Beyond that?  ...drawing blanks.  So, you probably shouldn't check in here if you're looking for auto repair -

OH, oh..  it could be cool to share some interesting recipes, cool entertainment...  yeeeaaaah...  I do have a small passion for games, so that might crop up from time to time, too.  Besides, games and mathematics are closely related...

If you think about it, mathematics is a foundation for a lot of stuff - probably the reason why language and mathematics are considered the core of an education.  Wasn't it the German mathematician Gauss who said:

Mathematics is the queen of the sciences, and arithmetic is the queen of mathematics.

Now, I should mention, "I don't study mathematics for the calculation.  My enjoyment of the subject is much more rooted in the logic, deduction, and proof.  An elegant proof has an artistic beauty to it."

Well, it's looking like my house mates are about to sit down to it, so I'm going to post this now, and come back to the blog later...

A little goal setting, for the blogging?

Several weeks have passed now, since last I wrote something here. Now, the plan was to write once a week, and I even mentioned reviving Movie Monday and Tune Tuesday in the last post...

Life just gets busy and/or distracting. Sigh

I work nights, and I have Mondays and Wednesdays off. There's not a lot I can do in Austin proper in those early morning hours of those nights off..

So, considering my current schedule, I am going to set a goal:

I will try to post at least one blog entry by 7 a.m., Wednesday, of each week.

So, I was lying in bed this morning, thinking, "Why doesn't anyone take an interest in my life?"
Then, I thought, "Maybe I have some unrealistic expectations on what that interest would look like...."
...and, THEN I THOUGHT, "Duh. It's a rare moment, indeed, that I'm taking an interest in other's lives."
'To cultivate compassion, one must practice compassion.' - Dalai Lama, paraphrased

just reviewed his profile wall, and especially the last month or so of status updates.
"Interesting... start seeing some common themes that bring clarity to others' comments on the more recent stuff..."
Have you considering reviewing your wall lately?

I will now attempt to get one hour of sleep. Hopefully, there may be room for more this evening....
Aaaahhh.. I'm such a fan of Lord Morpheus...

I have heard, "Still waters run deep."
...however, another part of me is beginning to wonder if "Still waters beget stagnation"...
...I suppose the crux of the difference is the presence or absence of a purpose in one's (e.g. "my") life.

some time around 3, this morning, the winter whipper-snapper wound its way into south austin... having a cigarette, half a hour later, I thought, "yeppers.. it's gotten cold, quick!"
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It looks like the high today will be 33 degrees centigrade (~mid to high 80's fahrenheight), with a chance for rain... in Sydney, that is..
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now, once again, I shall take a stab at getting some sleep. Hoping that 3 blankets on the bed and pajamas keep me warm...