some collection of words that try to convey how disrupted the sleep is, how the joints are aching from lack of relaxation and the stress is ever building higher...
or another group claiming such bleak isolation, self-imposed perhaps...
or that choking feeling at the top of my throat - like food wants to come up, or mucus can't go down further - or maybe it's just words that got stuck
all these little complaints, all these little wishes - to be comforted, to be comfortable, to break out of this watery cell, to climb away from this dirty earthy mud-slinging.
ah, to be grateful! to realize there are loving friends and family out there (but they are not here, now)... to realize that I ate twice today... to realize that I can attempt sleep in shelter from the rain...
to be grateful that there is still some luxury, or else I would not be typing this rambling rant, listening to the Rolling Stones, and
yet,
i court death and regret