What is this yearning, this craving, this procrastination? I hear my addict calling for chocolate, for sugar, for worse... I see myself scrolling through the babble, hoping to uncover some gem, some insight...
I fear crawling into bed, and having a restless night, because I slept four hours earlier this evening. I fear sleep disrupted, leading to work disrupted, leading to cracks in the financial foundations I'm trying to build - missing money, because of missed work, because of missed sleep.
I crave a day off, after two weeks of working daily and another approaching week of the same. I want to laugh and play with friends, to enjoy the night off, and recharge those sectors of life not touched by the Hell of retail...
Hell.. I want a real career, that I could enjoy financial freedom again. I want a pocketbook that I can play with, a car that can get me places, a place of my own to call home.
And, when I find myself, yet another night, alone; I wish I had a companion I could whisk the night away with, in games or conversation or intimacy. Yet, in this moment this instant, I feel unloved and unwanted, and the cravings intensify.
If only I had chocolate?
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