I see this negative swamp trying to pull me under its brackish, cloudy surface...
I also see so many well wishes upon my birthday... so many contacts from across the spectrum of my life.
I do not think my enemy has ever been you - it has always been me... me holding up fun house mirrors, trying to convince me that their distortion is how reality is supposed to BE.
Are they reflections that I’ll never measure up, that I’ll never fit in... that I just can’t bring enough to the table? I hear a cloud, thinking, “if you’re alive, you’re succeeding!”
And I’m reminded of the recent meeting(s), talking of fear... and my unspoken share: “I do not want to be limited. I do not understand boundaries.”
Twin minds within my skull: one that appreciates good company, and the other so afraid that I have nothing good to give...
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