my first thoughts feel like whining, again...
today seemed ok, though. my saturday Arkham deck builder card group made it through part two with minimal damage, and minimal mistakes. the topic at AA was from the 12&12; and I got to babble on about it. Made some food at home, and watched two movies.
I became aware that we had a shooter in El Paso, which I'm not sure if I've become desensitized to these events, as they happen rather often. yes, it's distressing, but i do not know what small moves I can make to diffuse future events...
I'm itching again, and I'm hoping that the antibiotic cream may help clear that up. I still have laundry to fold, and a desire to hop in the shower. I'd like to be asleep before 3...
yet, some of the games on the phone are one my mind... damn my competitive streak... damn the obsessions..
...and again... i want to feel like a regular part of other people's lives. perhaps i want to be distracted from my own, with its limited pallette of choices. perhaps I want to be forgiven? perhaps I want the mystery removed from what i've done wrong...
i could see this as a route back into heavy reading.
i want to shy away from celebrity gossip and politics, though; as I feel like I have so little ability to influence the actions of people who aren't in the room with me.
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