I feel ashamed to ask for money and/or food, right now.
So, instead, I end up starving myself to the point of utter exhaustion, making it difficult to stay awake at my job and difficult to prepare what food I do have at home.
...and my defects of sloth and greed and gluttony become active, as I start to hoard my cans of soup or eat more than my share of volunteer meals.
I want to kick myself awake, unable to believe that I'm in this nightmare of working two jobs, and yet still not able to get ahead of my debt. However, I've been here before, many times before, and I'm left stunned, asking myself, "Why?"
...I just need a primal scream. Like all the other beggars, I'll watch as you pass by, shaking your heads, claiming, "It's not my problem!" Honestly, it really isn't your problem... making it all that much hard convincing myself to ask you for help.
I'm sure there's tons of flaws in my thinking about how to earn, spend, and save my money...
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